So, it appears this will be the very first blog post on this wiki. That's a mighty big step. Ought to be meaningful, dignified and all that Jazz.
So of course I'm going to dwelve into my crazy fanon theories, as soon as I'm done bemoaning my fate.
My untimely sense of getting injured
So, as it says in my profile I don't really like running. As such, I put of trying the app until a Sunday ten days ago when I was going to the gym where they had a treadmill and I figured Id torture myself through a run with the app.
As it turned out, after 30 minutes of mixed brisk walk and sprint I had sweat pouring off of me and I still felt absolutely wonderful - and slightly in love with dear Sam. The same day, on the afternoon, I set out for the next mission. Unfortunately my newfound enthusiasm collided with the worst weathe we've had for several weeks and the next day I made an attempt at the airdrop on my way to the store - in cascades of rain that left my drop point submerged in a puddle as deep as my hand. When I got back fom the store I was so damp that I could wring the water out of my pants.
Tuesday evening, I do the stupid childish things I do and run down the stairs for no good reason. The good news is that I stumbled at the bottom of the stairs and could right myself befoe I crashed face-first into something uncomfortable, such as the floor. The bad news is that I upon landing twisted my foot so that I something got mildly damaged. My foot is now prone to swelling up to twice its size and aches ever so slightly. A bit of pressure bangages, painkillers and a newfound habit of keeping my foot held high when I sit down or sleep is all it takes to keep it normal-ish but the zombie chases will have to wait until I can squeeze my foot into a real shoe again instead of the ovesized slip-on-shoes I found on the men's department (womanly shoes are just not in any way forgiving to swelling).
Had it not been for such a compelling app I would with great certainty taken this as the perfect excuse to not move an inch unless I absolutely had to, I am that lazy. As it is, I stayed put for four days before I decided to head out on walks at least. My pace is atrocious and last Tuesday (the 19th) I managed to wander off into the woods and get lost during one of our daily downpours. During my squelching shambling through the vegetation I played "Alternates" (Paula's message) and couldn't help to think that it was strangely fitting.
When I first tried the app I thought the most compelling thing about running in a zombie game was the threat of zombies, but the more I listen the stronger I feel that in truth it is the story that drives me on. This became quite obvious to me last Sunday (the 17th). See, every Sunday me and my family drive off to the nearest bath house (half an hour away with car, we live some way away from civilization) where I usually spend 20 minutes at the most in the gym before soaking in the bath and treating myself to a visit in the sauna. This Sunday I started out hunting down Tess. Well, one more mission can't hurt, I can switch to another training machine, so I go on the supply run as well. At the end of that I don't even bother to look at the clock to contemplate soaking time, I need to hear A Voice in the Dark. So there I sit, alone in the gym strapped into one of the work-out machines and lifting weights for 30 minutes straight while dear Sam is having a breakdown inbetween the Silent Hill soundtrack I use as my playlist.
Silent Hill soundtracks are excellent ambient music for your Zombies, run! playlist.
Who is runner 5?
Slenderman. Okay, so I still haven't finished season 1, but hear me out here. Runner five is always adressed very vaguely and is completely voiceless - of course, since any of us should be able to be runner five. But it would also fit in on a humanoid faceless monster. Bonus points because those tentacles would explain how he can carry so darn many axes, medical kits, crutches, clothes, tool boxes, fuel cans, swords, laptops and car batteries. I know I would have buckled already under the tool box alone.
Since this morning I've had this weird urge to draw fanart of Slenderman as runner 5. Doubly weird because I have sworn off drawing, seeing as I'm not good at it and it usually makes me unhappy. What is this witchcraft? I have neve even been that interested in the Slenderman mythos, what with the Rake obviously being much scarier. And yet, and yet...
Apparantly I'm not the first to pair Slendy with zombies, if the app "Slenderman vs. zombies" is anything to go by. Either way, it pleases me in all kinds of strange ways to imagine Slenderman assisting the Abel Township - even if it does make the Lost Child episode even more disturbing than it already is with a small child lost in a zombie area...
Perhaps it is time for me to add the Slenderman theme song to my Silent Hill playlist?